Smart singles dating
The writing of the books was precipitated by the endemic dating woes on the Harvard campus as I observed them as an advisor and, earlier, indulged in them as a student.
Once upon a day I used to be pretty smart, and believe me, I had a lock on clueless. -- and then continue doing even more of what you were doing before.Well, congratulations -- you've just eliminated 95 percent of the world's population as a potential mate, Mr. Even if only 1 percent of those are single enough, good-looking enough, local enough and just all-around cool enough for you, that's over a million people you can date out there. And if you live in a smaller city, it may be just a handful of folks who are going to meet your stringent criteria.At this point, you have three choices: A) Loosen up B) Do a very thorough search all over the planet and be prepared to move to Duesseldorf OR C) Join a monastery. The purpose of relationship (and perhaps all of life) is to practice the loving. Nobody's asking to lower your standards here; you should still spend time only with worthwhile company.It may get you a first date, but it's probably not going to get you a second date.And it certainly won't bring you lasting love and fulfillment.Unless you actually convey femininity as a woman or masculinity as a man, you're not going to attract a suitable companion of the opposite sex. You're exceptionally talented at getting in the way of your own romantic success.Part of the issue is this: When all of your personal energy is concentrated in the head, it never gets a chance to trickle down to the heart, or, god forbid, the groin. Here's an incontrovertible fact: Every one of your ancestors survived to reproductive age and got it on at least once with a member of the opposite sex. And even further back to monkeys, to lizards, to the first amphibian that crawled out of the slime, the fish that preceded that amphibian, the worm before the fish and the amoeba that preceded the worm. E., the culmination of that miraculously unbroken line of succession, you, .Their DNA had a vested interest in perpetuating itself, so it made sure that happened. And maybe when you're really sloshed at a party and your whole frontal lobe is on vacation in the outer rings of Saturn, you've noticed that your lizard brain knows exactly how to grab that cute girl by the waist for a twirl on the dance floor.Or knows exactly how to arch your back, flip your hair and glance at that handsome hunk just so such that he comes on over to say hi. By virtue (or vice) of being smart, you eliminate most of the planet's inhabitants as a dating prospect.To put it plainly, you are programmed to reproduce. Let's say by "smart" we mean "in the top 5 percent of the population in terms of intelligence and education." Generally speaking, smart people seek out other smart people to hang out with, simply because they get bored otherwise.Now quit thinking you're smarter than the 3 billion base pairs in your genome and 4 billion years of evolution. And if they're going to spend a lot of time with someone, intelligence in a partner is pretty much a requirement. Now, luckily, the world's kinda big, so the remaining 5 percent of the gender of your choice is still a plentiful 160 million or so people.