Rubber band effect dating
To him going out with the lads would be done on a second notice but for me i'd think first about what he's doing and would irather spend time with him or is that just me being clingy.I've no problem with going lenghts of time not txting.That's not to say he won't ever be, he might also just not be as emotionally open and may be fine with spending only the weekends with you. Then eventually I started picking up my own hobbies and interests and going out with my girlfriends. Didn't realise this was a universal phenomenon until I read John Gray's Men are from Mars, Women are from Venus.If you are not happy with this, maybe you can kindly hint at it with him without sounding clingy or needy. It kinda made sense and I haven't stressed about it since. Gave me something to chat about when I saw them next and made me realise that I was in charge of my own life and personal growth. When a relationship starts it's all hot and heavy and pretty demanding in terms of time.I spend about 50-60% of my time alone when in a relationship. Too much time in constant company and begin to feel my personal thoughts are bleeding out of my ear. The theories in this book apply to dating and marriage. the why is he going cold why is he doing this blah blah.. AFter he had his little space at the weekend he's come right back making plans and talking about our holiday.
Deny some-one the ability to go back to those things if enjoyed before you, is a sure-fire way to court a failing relationship.
Basically your guy pulls away for "him time" ( but to us girls or me at least this is him not being interested) and after a few days comes back.
The trick is to not run after him at this stage and just leave him be. I think over the corse of the weekend i went about it the right way in my ownnatural way..
I also have no porblem doing a few days not seeing him, currently its mainly weekends. He has his own place so its easier and i won't just invite myself over.
But when this pattern changes can we really put things down to the rubber band effect ot him actually not being interested.. It hasn't really been a case of not spending time together or that decreasing. So to retract and try make this clearer i'm just curious as to what people think about this theory..