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It can make people very uptight and anxious," Maltz says.
That's particularly true if either you or your partner finds the content of a particular fantasy off-putting.
You'll be doing yourself and your partner a disservice if you don't," Mc Clary says.
Even sex experts who believe that revealing erotic fantasies to your partner can strengthen the relationship acknowledge that this tell-all scenario isn't for everyone.
"She's thinking, 'I want my husband to romanticize me more,'" Maltz says.
The bottom line in sharing sex fantasies is this: "How the information in the fantasy is shared is critical to whether or not it ends up being productive for the couple," says Maltz.
Not everyone truly desires to act on their sexual fantasies, Maltz explains. "Erotic fantasiescan help you learn about your partner's sensuality," Maltz says.You've been sharing a bed with the same partner for years.By now you know each other's sleeping habits inside and out, right down to the exact room temperature and sleeping position preferred.That's because too often, says Maltz, there's a lack of understanding about what it means to share them.To minimize misunderstandings, Maltz suggests setting some guidelines before agreeing to reveal erotic fantasies."Your partner loves to see you turned on, and fantasies are what take you there," says Cheryl Mc Clary, Ph D, JD, professor of women's health at the University of North Carolina-Asheville. But by all means, she says, don't keep your erotic fantasies to yourself.What's more, she says, "If you're not turned on, your partner is going to know it." She suggests ways to bring yourself to a heightened sense of arousal, before sharing that experience with your partner. "Call your partner at work and share your fantasies.In spite of recent research that tells us it's perfectly normal, healthy even, to engage in sexual fantasies, many people bury or ignore what makes them feel good.The result, they say, can be an unfulfilling sex life. Rent movies with sex scenes that turn you on," Mc Clary says.But how well do you know what it takes to turn on your partner?There's one way to find out -- by sharing your most intimate sex fantasies.